"You'll never be able to jump more the 2 foot because you're too heavy"
"You'll never place, let alone win in EQ or Hunter shows because of your weight"
"Someone your size will only ever be able to ride draft horses"
Growing up around horses I was told all of this and more. I have always been a big girl, tallest person in my class all through elementary school and most of middle school, and chubby to boot, I was teased a lot. Even now I'm a solid 6 feet tall and hovering around 275 at the moment. I will never be a "Skinny" person, a healthy weight for my height and build is between 190 and 200lbs, and my hips will never let me into a jean size below a 14. So even if I was at a healthy weight I would still be considered plus sized, heavy, overweight, etc by society and more specifically horse world standards.
When I was young I was always the big kid at the barn. My instructor was constantly telling me that I was too heavy. I remember one time she pulled me off of the pony I was riding in the middle of a lesson, brought me up to the house and made me get on the scale. I was probably 10 years old, it was horrible and embarrassing. I never did ride that pony again. And when I say pony I don't mean welsh or Shetland, this was a 14.2 solid built mustang. At the age of maybe 11 I was informed that because of my weight I was only able to ride 2 of the horses on the farm, an old QH thing and a draft cross, just those 2 out of like 25 horses. I was 11...
Now I know that trainer was extreme, and that if I had grown up riding somewhere else I probably wouldn't have gone through that kind of experience. But I did, and I'll tell you it did a number on my psyche, my self-image and my confidence on the horses. I was told that I would never be able to jump anything over 2 foot because I was too heavy. That I could ride in shows if I wanted to but I probably wouldn't place, let alone win, in the hunter or EQ classes because when I rode I didn't make a pretty picture, and that the only horses I would ever be able to ride would be drafts and draft crosses.
By the time I was 16 I started learning to stand up for myself. My parents bought me my first horse, and we didn't consult with my trainer at all (that really pissed her off). I ended up with a 17 year old solid red dunn appaloosa gelding named Phoenix. She hated him because he wasn't her idea of what I should ride. But I loved that horse more then anything, and I learned a whole lot from him. We kicked butt at local shows placing in and even winning EQ over fences and under saddle classes.
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| This is me and Phoenix the first year I had him |
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| Phoenix and I at a show when I was 17 |
Have most of my horses been drafts or crosses? Yes, but that is because I love draft horses, I have ridden paints, QHs, appaloosas, thoroughbreds, warmbloods,etc. Everything I went through when I was younger has pushed me to be the best rider that I can be for me. Do I have confidence issues sometimes? Of course, but I'll tell you it never has anything to do with my size.
Never let other people get you down. As Eleanor Roosevelt once said, "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent."
If you want to jump, then jump.
If you want to do dressage, then do dressage.
If you want to paint your horse like a rainbow unicorn and pretend your a fairy princess, then do it. Do what makes you happy. Do what you want. Do you.
I grew up being told all the things I couldn't do because of my size. Never again. I can be who ever i want to be!
Now I have this beautiful creature to love and train. We are going to go far, I know we will because I have faith in myself, faith in my abilities and faith in my horse.
